Poop patrol hates puppies.

The poop patrol is on a power trip in some Front Range communities, charging hefty fines against pet owners if their pup answers to nature’s call on apartment property grounds or in fiefdoms ruled by HOAs.

The poop is identified through a DNA base of pets living in the area, a truly Orwellian practice that famed whistleblower Edward Snowden failed to warn us about, and fines of $100 per poop are levied against the pet owner.

Michael Liddle who lives in Broomfield discovered that he had been fined by the poop patrol after receiving a notice that $200 had been taken out of his rent check for two pooping offenses.

Liddle told Channel 7 News he faced eviction because the subtracted fine meant his rent was not paid in full.

The offending poop producer?

“She’s a Teacup Chihuahua and she’s a runt. Her droppings are no larger than what geese leave behind.”

Liddle says he’s diligent about poop-scooping.

“But the grass is really tall. And especially at nighttime, it’ll fall down in between the grass and you can’t see it.”

This is a disturbing trend with which dozens of apartment complexes and HOAs are participating, and we’ve heard no outcry from the liberal left.

Probably because these purported lovers of the animal kingdom and activists of animal freedom are always the first to scream that pets should always be chained to their master when outdoors, and that animals leave no trace behind of their existence. It’s nasty and dirty and has no place in the clean and sparkly outdoors, they insist.

We hate stepping in poop as much as anyone, but we don’t think our pets should be swabbed for DNA and a database created to nail them to crimes, any more than we think a database of human DNA be created for the same purpose.

These poop Nazis need to get over their first-world problems, and just learn to watch where they step.