From the files of stuff we can’t make up: Here’s how Gov. Polis greeted the news state wildlife officials had tagged the state’s first gray wolf with these responses on Facebook and Twitter:

It’s not that we don’t care whether the wolves are confirmed bachelors or “hunting partners” — actually we don’t.

What actually grabbed our attention is the claim by Colorado officials the wolf was on our side of the border with Wyoming when their contractors spotted it from a helicopter, shot it with a tranquilizer and netted it.

Full of tranquilizer juice and tangled into a net, the wolf escaped back into Wyoming where it was subdued and collared with a GPS tracking device that claims it as a Colorado wolf.

We’re not suggesting the contractors concocted the story after tagging a Wyoming wolf on the Wyoming side of the state border because they couldn’t find any wolves — gay or straight — in Colorado.

Surely there’s a “Welcome to Colorful Colorado” sign up in those mountains somewhere that clearly marks our territory.

Meanwhile, Wyoming might want to keep a closer eye on their wolves, should some go mysteriously missing.