There’s nothing more useless during the holiday season than advice columns offered by the legacy media for liberal and conservative family members to get along during Thanksgiving dinner.
They just don’t get it.
Conservatives are a bunch of contrarians who live to annoy liberals and aren’t interested in getting along, especially when it involves family members.
So in the spirit of the holiday season, which may be the first with family since China unleashed COVID from those labs funded by Dr. Fauci, here’s our suggestions on how to amuse yourself with those progressives you call family.
Insist that everyone wear a mask while eating, cut a slit through yours. Add lipstick according to your gender preference.
Argue for the unvaccinated to sit at the big table where the air can circulate better, while the vaccinated folks sit at the kiddie table.
If it’s a potluck dinner, bring toilet paper and defend its value well over that of candied yams.
Inquire about the cost of every food item served down to the french fried onions in the broccoli cassarole, then compare it to the good times of the Trump economy.
You’ll need this handy guide:
Spend time with the little ones and ask what they’re learning in school, in front of their parents.
Challenge the college kids with tough math equations: If Joe has a 36% approval rating but Kamala only has 28%, how many votes will Democrats need to steal the next election?
Organize a riot after dinner to work off all that food.
Good luck in cutting back that Christmas gift list, and have a happy Thanksgiving!