Call it karma or a just a statistical certainty, but the news that Denver Mayor Mike Johnston’s car was stolen, again, has the universe in stitches.

Johnson’s vehicle is the 11,305th victim to go missing this year in a city that is growing weary of playing Grand Theft Auto.

Interestingly, the mayor’s office refuses for some odd reason to disclose where the vehicle was parked when it was abducted.

Where was the mayor hanging out that needs to be kept so super secret in order to protect the safety of his family?

Criminals have already figured out the undisclosed location, so the information isn’t exactly secret.

We’re guessing Johnston no longer drives the Bronco-themed monstrosity that was stolen a few years ago, and not surprisingly, recovered just a few days later.

We have questions.

Was the most recent vehicle of his stolen another gas guzzler, or electric? Was it a city-owned vehicle paid for with our tax dollars?

Was the mayor somewhere he shouldn’t be, like a steak house?

It’s been a month since the vehicle was stolen, why are we just now finding out about it?

More importantly, if the thief is caught, will they be prosecuted or awarded with welfare benefits?