Did you hear?  All of society’s ills are due to fracking.  Or, at least, that’s what one fractivist who testified last week at the Rifle Oil and Gas Task Force Meeting would like you to believe. Here’s his testimony, courtesy of Revealing Politics:

First, it’s not even clear that the societal ills that he claims are accurate – apparently, he’s found a way to prove voter fraud where others have failed.  We’d like to see some backup data to show that crime rates in Garfield County are increasing – and increasing faster than population growth.  But, in the spirit of scapegoating fracking for everything, might we suggest also blaming fracking for the following issues:

  • Homelessness
  • Ebola
  • Justin Bieber
  • Teenage pregnancy
  • Lack of efficacy of this year’s flu shot
  • The rise of ADHD
  • Materialism around Christmas
  • Ferguson
  • Kim Kardashian cropping her daughter out of a selfie
  • Mary Landrieu’s loss

Wait, actually, that last one might be legit.  Have we forgotten anything, PeakNation™?  If so, please feel free to add in the comments below.