Goldie HawnWe’ve never had the honor of attending the Aspen Ideas Festival, where people no one’s ever even heard of gather with politicians and celebrities to solve every imaginable and possibly real problems that plague Mother Earth.

But with a line-up this week that includes Snowmass resident Goldie Hawn being interviewed by Michael Eisner, former CEO of Walt Disney, we’re tempted to ditch work and hit the Big Ideas event on Thursday to see what she has to say.

We expect the agenda would include her thoughts on the Mid East conflict and the ongoing ISIS threat through the lens of her role as “Private Benjamin,” a high society gal who joins the Army to find her true love.

The state of feminism should be high on her list, instructing women how to get even with ex-husbands through blackmail and bankrupt cheating spouses, as she explained in “The First Wives Club.”

We would hope for an insightful discussion on how to deal with police brutality – breaking her husband out of prison, kidnapping their son, then taking a policeman hostage worked out just swell in “The Sugarland Express.”

We’re certain to hear her take on the plight of manicurists working in sweathouse conditions in New York salons, based on her role in “Shampoo.”

To wrap it all up, we’re hoping for a repeat performance of her lecture on why it’s good to be dumb, because war and pollution, all of the world’s problems are caused by smart people, she explained.