The New York Times wrote an amusing, and by all appearances an accurate portrayal of John Hickenlooper’s vainglorious run for the
windmill White House, beginning with this insightful lead sentence:
“Can John Hickenlooper interest you in a joke?”
The eventual punchline of the article — the only way Hick’s candidacy will ever catch fire is when the proverbial snowball lands in Hell.
It’s a flailing campaign, we learn, which persists despite the sheer cluelessness of the candidate, and a complete lack of interest among voters in early election states.
The Times says Hick appears genuinely surprised that his campaign has failed to resonate with anyone outside of Colorado.
Hick’s also disappointed his rich buddies failed to make it rain millions of dollars. His campaign war chest is at poverty levels for a presidential run with less than $837,000 cash on hands.
As he prepared to enter the race several months ago, he privately assured associates he had a handle on how to distinguish himself.
“What struck me was how confident he was,” recalled Gary Hart, the former Colorado senator and two-time presidential candidate to whom Mr. Hickenlooper made a pilgrimage for a meeting before his 2020 run. “I just said, ‘John, it really costs a lot of money.’ He said, ‘I’ve got that covered, I have a lot of wealthy friends and friends who know wealthy people who have committed to raise whatever it takes.’ That made me a little nervous.”
Mark these words, because it’s unlikely we will ever repeat them.
The NYT story, “Here’s Why John Hickenlooper and His Banjo Are Still in the 2020 Race,” is actually worth reading.